A Letter to Nkem

Nkem, Ah how I miss you so. The many hours we spent together. Who knew that that silly comment you made long before we ever knew anything about each other would become such an inside joke? Oh and what a hilarious joke it was. I shall never tell another soul about it. It will be our secret, one that will forever bring smiles to our faces, and laughter to our hearts. And I’m glad you made that joke. For years after you said it, it would forever be a yardstick for our friendship. It would forever remind us of how far we have come together.

My love, do you remember the times we shared together? The times we spent talking? We never ran out of words for each other. We never ran out of stories to tell. I just loved to hear your voice echo as we lay side by side in the darkness. Oh and your laughter? The sound of pure joy. Your laugh equally filled me with laughter. Your smile brought the brightest smile in me. It was what nurtured the fire in my eyes. And when you teased me, I loved it- every moment of it. Sweet fond memories.

Nkem. I have so much to tell you. Because soon enough, you will grow up so fast. And all of a sudden, when the sun is setting and the day is almost over, I will realize how much you’ve grown, how the years have gone by, how many moments I have missed. And I will regret not telling you. I will regret not saying all the things on my mind. And I will feel like I failed you. Thus, the time has come. So I must ask you now.

When he compliments you, does he only compliment the fleeting things? Does he only tell you how pretty you are and how sought after you are? Does he only mention your sleek figure and your long legs? Does he compliment you like someone who only looks at you, and not like someone who truly sees at you? Dear one, there is definitely a difference. If he truly sees you, he will see your beautiful smile, the melody in your laugh, the humor in your words, the cheerfulness in your being. And when you call him, does he run to you? Does he drop all things for you? Like someone who cares? Or is he constantly unavailable, busy, otherwise engaged? When you talk does he listen attentively? Does he laugh in all the right places and urge you to go along? Does he smile at you fondly while you ramble on, saying stories he has heard a million times? Or does he grumble as you speak, interrupt you multiple times, glance at his watch, or look at you bored? When you tell him you miss me, does he let your tears fall, and hold you in his arms? Does he tell you I am always there in your heart? Does he remind you that you carry me in your spirit? Or does he pretend like he does not see your tears? Or purposely turn away, ignoring you in your time of need?

Nkem, do not be swayed by expensive gifts. Sometimes, the littlest actions are the biggest clues. Like when he brings you coffee the morning of your big exam. When he walks you to class and back. When he stays up to help you study for an exam. When you’ve been down and he brings you your favorite candy. Or when the red curse comes and you’re in pain and he holds you while the waves of cramps rack your stomach. It may not be an expensive Rolex or a diamond earring. He may not buy you a car, or take you to five star restaurants every day. But these little gestures mean a lot Nkem, they sure do.

I’m telling you these things so you can pick wisely, Nkem. I don’t want you to make the mistake that many women before us have done, and many women after us will make. I want you to know these things as early as you can, so that when the time comes, you choose wisely. You know by now, that your happiness is my happiness. My darling, you know I have never been one to nag. But I need you to take heed to my words.

My love for you is as bright as day. See you soon dear one.